The Half Baked Lunatic

I’ve been back in the USA for two weeks now, and I’m still adjusting to a few things. For the past year, my family has lived in Switzerland – and the whole time we complained bitterly about the high cost of food there.  Buying groceries to eat at home is expensive enough – but going out to a restaurant?  It’s completely outrageous. The hot lunch program at our kid’s elementary school is a great example of food prices in Switzerland.  The “normal” school lunch was $10 – or you could get a “small lunch” without side dish or dessert for $7.50 (but it did come with a drink).  The third option was a plain hot dog in a bun for $5.50 (no drink included). To put this in perspective: if we bought the “small lunch” every day, the cost of school lunch in Switzerland was more than the tuition we paid every month at the private school we sent the kids to when we lived in Ecuador! Even fast food is expensive – a combo meal at McDonalds (regular burger, fries, and small drink) is $14. The only “deal” we found was at the Middle Eastern dives which were fairly common throughout the city; you could get a Gyro or a “Duram Kabap” for just under $10. (all the prices were actually in Swiss Francs, of course – but the Franc is just about on par with the US dollar so I’m saying dollars just for comparison to US meals). So for the past year, we very seldomly ate out at restaurants. All of the stereotypes you hear about the “precision” of the Swiss are absolutely true.  The drinking glasses they use in bars and restaurants all have measurement lines etched into the side of the glass.  You buy soft drinks, beer, and wine by the deciliter (tenth of a liter).  Beer and soda servings are usually 3 or 5 dl and wine is available in any multiple of 1 dl – and they fill the glass EXACTLY to the line. Not a hair over or under.  Self serve soda, or anything with free refills, is completely unheard of. (and since sugar is not subsidized by the governmen... [More]

I’ve never tried pot. It’s not that I have any moral objections to Marijuana , and I really don’t care whether it’s legal or illegal – it’s not a big issue to me.  The reason I have never smoked Marijuana is the same reason why I don’t smoke cigarettes: I just can’t understand why anyone would willingly inhale the soot and tar and ash of burning carcinogens into their lungs.  Blech.  You might as well suck on the exhaust pipe of your local city bus for all the good it’s going to do for you! Back around 1985 or so, I was staying at a friends house for a few days and he asked if I wanted to smoke a joint with him.  I politely declined, but he was persistent.  After he finished the first joint by himself, he rolled me a fresh one and offered it again.  When I convinced him I really didn’t want it, he put it in a plastic baggie and told me to bring it home and keep it – just in case I was ever in the mood to give it a go. I put it in my suitcase without really thinking much about it, and when I was packing up to go home I threw it into my toiletry kit alongside my razor, toothbrush, deodorant, and travel size bottle of shampoo. The joint ended up staying in my toiletry bag for the next ten years. During those years I was a global exhibits manager (travelling to over 20 trade shows a year, half of them international), a product manager (visiting customers and training our sales team worldwide), and an Asia regional manager (primarily supporting our sales offices in Tokyo and Hong Kong, but still attending trade shows and attending marketing meetings at our corporate headquarters in the UK). My joint was with me on many trips to South America, Europe, and Asia; we became very well acquainted. According to my United Airlines statements, I accrued over 700,000 actual flight miles during those years. It was during one of my many trips to Singapore that I realized that I had been smuggling pot into some very strict countries.  S... [More]

I consider my family to be a fairly “healthy” eaters.  We consume a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables and eat very little fast food (only a few times a year). My kids are never allowed to drink soda, except when they are at a party or some function where there are no alternatives.  We eat a lot of fish and pasta.  And although I love beef, lamb, pork, and chicken, we limit our portion sizes and try to stick to lower fat recipes. However, I have mixed opinions about the “organic” food movement. I admit it’s important to openly discuss better/safer/healthier/environmentally friendly ways of feeding our growing population, and there are many organic products and processes I agree with wholeheartedly – but many of the organic guidelines are based on emotion rather than facts and real data. The use of synthetic fertilizers, for example, is one of the hottest topics. I liken the use of fertilizers to indoor plumbing. In the 1800’s, many people thought that the idea of defecating inside your own home was disgusting and unsanitary. Early toilets and sinks routinely backed up and would make a big mess.  And most importantly, the pipes were initially made of lead – which leached into the water supply. But eventually, these problems were worked out, and no one in the world can deny the benefits of indoor plumbing today. Instead of halting the use of synthetic fertilizers, as the organic community proposes, I think we need to admit that they have benefits – but continue to improve them and fix the problems.  In reality, “organic” farming methods are not always healthiest or the most environmentally friendly.  More water is required for organic farming, which means more runoff – and the runoff created from cow manure is just as harmful to lakes and streams as synthetic fertilizers. Since you can not grow nearly as many crops per acre of land using organic methods, you need more land – which means that more “natural” land and forests need to be... [More]

The star studded 1983 movie "The Big Chill” was about a weekend reunion of a bunch of old college friends – now in their early 30’s – who all get together for the funeral of Alex, one of their classmates who committed suicide. The movie is poignant, intelligent, very funny, and somewhat disturbing all the same time. It’s about rekindling old friendships, coping with the shock of their friend Alex’s death, and wondering what happened to the social idealism that they all shared when they attended the University of Michigan in the late 60’s. They were all anti-establishment, idealistic, smart, enthusiastic, with a vocal desire to change the world and make it a better place. Alex, now deceased, was a charismatic science major. Everyone thought he was the most intelligent one of the bunch – and their mutual friendship really survived through the years because of him. He was the glue that kept them all together, but he was never able to get his own life straightened out. Now, in 1983, they realize they are becoming the conservative “establishment” that they protested against in college.  They are all relatively secure financially, and on upward career paths – so they can’t even blame each other for “selling out” as they are all equally guilty. It’s an excellent story, a wonderful cast, with an infectious late 60’s hit-filled soundtrack.  Let’s get to know the characters a little bit: Sarah (Glenn Close) is a physician, and married to ... Harold (Kevin Kline), who is a business executive. We find out that Sarah had an affair with Alex at one time, but Harold has forgiven her. Chloe (Meg Tilly) – Alex's young girlfriend. She is the only “outsider”, not part of the college group. Alex and Chloe had been living at Sarah and Harold’s home for some time before he slashed his wrists in their bathroom. Sam (Tom Berenger) had been a vocal protestor in college but is now a Hollywood star, somewhat reminiscent of Tom Selleck. He is now divor... [More]

I bought my wife the new Kindle, from Amazon, for her birthday last week.  I really love the whole idea of eBooks – the Kindle is quite portable (about the size of a regular book) with a gorgeous high resolution surface that is really easy to read. Plus, you can do cool things like set multiple bookmarks, change font size, store hundreds of books at one time, and download new books wirelessly from almost anywhere in the world. It even has “text to speech” built in so it can read to you! Wow. It really is very, very, very cool technology. But there’s one thing that still bugs me ... we read a lot, my wife and I both go through a few books a month. So it’s quite likely we could spend a few hundred dollars (or more) on a library of Kindle books over the next couple of years. But what guarantee do we have that we will still be able to read them in ten years?  What happens if our Kindle device breaks, and there is no replacement?  Or what if the best device on the market in ten years happens to be a product from another company, which isn’t compatible with our library of Kindle eBooks? This isn’t just an issue with the Amazon Kindle, it’s an endemic problem with electronic distribution of all published material, whether it’s music, videos, books, what have you.  No one has really figured out how to properly handle copy protection and copyright management yet. Let’s back up for a little bit.  For the last 500 years or so, ever since Gutenberg invented the movable type printing press, you could buy a book and keep that book pretty much forever – if you took good care of it. If you want to re-read a book in 50 years, you are free to do so – even if the publisher of the book has gone out of business. You can also loan your book to a friend, or sell it “used” (although publishers, rightfully so, have always hated these practices). But even then, only one person at a time could read the book. Even if a book is re-sold multiple times as used, most l... [More]

Last summer, as we were moving from Washington DC to Switzerland, our flight was delayed by more than eight hours on the first leg of our journey.  Grrrrr.  Of course, we missed our connection. And we missed every other possible flight from Newark to anywhere in Europe – so we had to spend the night. Ahhhh ... back in wonderful Newark, New Jersey.  I guess I can’t say TOO many bad things about Newark because I have relatives there – but I think most people would agree that it’s not the most appealing place in the world. Let’s say it’s a few notches above Iraq, maybe not quite as nice as Zimbabwe. After a bit of haranguing, the airline was kind enough to pay for a room at the local Holiday Inn as compensation for the inexcusable delay , and to get me out of their hair and out of the airport they gave us some meal vouchers as well (really, we could have DRIVEN from Washington DC to Newark and we would have made our connecting flight with time to spare!) So the next morning, we had our last meal in the USA.  Connected to the Holiday Inn is Harold’s New York Deli (don’t let the name fool you, it’s really in Edison, New Jersey) where they claim to have the World’s Largest Pickle Bar. They serve half pound burgers for lunch ... and really big pancakes for breakfast.  Not just your “ordinary” big pancakes, the pancakes at Harold’s New York Deli are advertised as “Monster Size” and they run $9.95 each ($19.95 for a stack of three). I suggested to my two kids that they share one (recommended on the menu) but of course they each wanted one of their own. And we had the airline meal vouchers to pay for it, so what the heck? The pancakes show up and these suckers are 18 inches across, about three quarters of an inch thick, flopping over the side of the plates.  My kids didn’t even finish an eighth of their pancake – and we ended up taking most o... [More]

Many years ago, a neighbor of mine had a miscarriage after trying to get pregnant, unsuccessfully, for many years. It was very hard for me to see her go through such a terrible time. She was distraught.  I was upset.  Her husband was trying very hard to comfort her, and kept telling her “it was the will of god”. He didn’t know what else to say. Statistically, over 30% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage before the end of the third month, what’s medically known as a “spontaneous abortion.”  The number might even be higher, there is substantial evidence which says that many women don’t even realize they are pregnant if the miscarriage occurs about the time their next period is due.  Usually, a woman just assumes she is “late” by a few weeks.  The body just decides there is something wrong, and the pregnancy is terminated on the spot. So here’s my point. There are many who believe that all life is sacred, and that abortion is a sin, yet a “spontaneous abortion” which ends over 30% of all pregnancies worldwide is “the will of god”.  How come it’s ok for god to kill all these unborn children? He must be quite the bastard and the ultimate sinner.  If I were an angry, uninformed, born again Christian, I would have a real problem with this.  I mean, if it’s ok to kill a doctor who performs abortions, then the Christians must have solemn duty to kill god.  After all, he’s responsible for the deaths of more innocent babies than anyone.  Even Hitler wasn’t able to keep up with the number of outrageous murders that this god of theirs commits! But seriously, I can honestly say that I hope that no one is actually “pro abortion”.  It doesn’t matter if it’s “spontaneous” or an “induced” medical procedure, the net result is just the same. It’s a horrible way to end a pregnancy.  It’s difficult for both the mother and father, it’s expensive, and it’s just a messy process to have to go through, emotionally and physical... [More]

Just think: If you had started taking AloeControl when it was launched last summer, you could easily be 20 to 50 pounds lighter right now. Just think: If you had bought AloeAdvanced when you first heard about it, your cholesterol could finally be under control, you could have better concentration, more energy, less stiffness in your joints, better control over your blood sugar levels, and the comfort of knowing that you have the most effective anti-oxidant known on planet Earth combating the harmful free radicals in your body. * Just think: If you drank AloeRest on a regular basis in the evening or AloeBoost in the morning, you could be sleeping better at night and have more energy during the day. Just think: If you buy from USAloe, you could be paying less than half the price of what you are probably currently paying for competing products to maintain your health, and doing a whole lot more good for your body. And just think: If you had signed up as a USAloe distributor six months ago, you could have well over 1,500 people under your sales organization today and be collecting a generous commission, like I do. Now there’s even one more reason to think about USAloe – by invitation only for visitors to my website – you can receive nearly $100.00 worth of USAloe Health Drinks for just $14.99, including shipping! Choose from one of four different product packs: Wellness, Energy, Rest and Relaxation, or Weight Control. Each pack includes two quarts of your selected product, which normally retail for $29.99 EACH plus shipping.  In addition to the two quarts, you will receive two “sample shots” of all four of our great products, just to try them out: AloeAdvanced – Core nutrition, Super Antioxidant, Promotes Healthy Blood Sugar Levels, Promotes Healthy Cholesterol Levels * AloeBoost – All Day Energy, No Added Sugar, No Crash Later, Anti-Oxidant Support AloeControl – Control Your Cravings, Promotes Healthy Weight Control, Metabolic Enhancer ... [More]

Here’s a cute little nursery rhyme that my mother taught me when I was about five years old (it will take a few tries to get the pronunciation and cadence right): Starkle, Starkle, little twink - What the heck I are, you think? Up a high, the world so bove - Gee, you’d think I were in Love! The drunker I sit here, the longer I get. Why ossifer, what gives you the diarrhea that I’m under the affluence of incahol though some think’ll will peep I am! Hic. My mother had a lot of these funny drinking poems up her sleeve, but she never drank. Ever. (At least, not after I was born – she did when she was younger).  And myself – I had my very first drink of alcohol on my 21st birthday; a very dear friend named Linda took me out for lunch and bought me a beer.  I remember it well – it was a St. Pauli’s Girl. I remember the place – Brick Oven Pizza in Brunswick center in Grass Valley, California. I remember looking forward to my first taste of beer. I remember that I thought it was the most disgusting thing I had ever tasted. It was my first beer, and I was * pretty sure * that it was going to be my last. But over the years, I came to appreciate beer, and other drinks as well. I like big, bold, strong beers – don’t give me no pansy ass, watered down cow piss colored brew like Budweiser or Coors or (heaven forbid) Miller. I have a strong preference for Ales over Lagers.  I love Belgian beers (Leffe is one of my favorites), most wheat beers (Franziskaner, Widmere, Pyramid), IPA’s (too many to list), and most beers from exclusive producers like Dogfish Head (its very expensive, but you really need to try their “120 Minute IPA” at least once in your life – don’t accidentally get the 60 or 90 minute IPA, these are not the same thing). But my favorite line of beer would have to be from Unibroue, up in Quebec (they market it as Unibrew in the US). Their entire lineup is exquisite – La Fin du Monde, Don de Dieu, Maudite, T... [More]

It was one year ago today, July 19, 2008, that I moved with my family to Washington D.C. And in ten days from now, we’ll be leaving! We’re moving back to Europe next week. We knew our stay in D.C. would be only a year, which was fine with me.  I really wasn’t expecting to enjoy the nations capital. Although I was born on the east coast, we moved to Spokane, Washington in 1968, when I was five years old, and I lived on the west coast for the next 38 years.  Prior to moving here, my only visit to D.C. was a quick business trip in the early 80’s – for a trade show, which meant I spent the entire time at the convention center and didn’t really get out to see anything else. About the only thing I remember from that trip was A) it was the middle of winter, and whenever the roll-up doors were opened to let a truck into the exhibit hall during setup, there was an arctic blast of horrendously cold air, and B) I had to drive to New York after the trade show, and I got lost trying to get out of Washington D.C.  All the diagonal streets are horribly confusing for a first timer. But in the year that we’ve lived here, I’ve really come to love Washington D.C.  Besides the obvious attractions like the museums and monuments, there is an amazing amount of green space. Hundreds of acres of beautiful dense forest, where you can easily forget you’re inside a large city.  Just yesterday, in fact, we discovered that we can hike from our apartment all the way to our favorite fishing spot on the Potomac River (at Fletchers Boat House), staying in the National Forest the entire time (except for crossing a just a few streets.)  The trail cuts at least ten minutes walking time from the way we used to go! Since there is no “state” government here, all of the wilderness areas in Washington D.C. are actually “national forest” land.  How cool is that? There are no high-rise buildings in Washington D.C. either – no building can be taller than the Capital, so... [More]